CLOSED -Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

[caspar]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Handy how could you possibly miss the snow?!

We had snow for months last winter, it was awful!!

I love snow! The more the better. We had snow for months last year and it was great. For nearly a week nothing at all could get in or out of our village. Really brought the community alive! Brilliant stuff.

[Johanino]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Hi Angelic, Hi all. Yes I miss the summers up North, I dont miss the Highland Midges though. When we were in the Great Glen, I was always out till 10:30 or later mowing. Then for a few weeks in Mid Summer it only ever got dark for a few hours. It was light @ 3:30 - 4:00AM. Trouble is in Winter it hardly ever seemed to get light. Mind you we were boxed in by the hills, and that held the light back for a while.

Regards all,

Brilliant tales as always handy...

Yeah I reckon you should get the bottle of bubbly...and great news about Trapfly...where is he going? North Korea? (or does that sound a little too cruel?_


SC

[Johanino]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Only when you slip on the Ice

Like I said I'm a Sofern Softy these days, in winter while the locals are walking about in shorts and vests (even our postie was still in shorts at Christmas last year), Handy has his thermals and ski mask on.

I do sympathise with angelic, up in her neck of the woods you can still see snow in August. Great if you want to go round with planks of wood on your feet. Mind you they used to do that down in the fens, but that was to stop them sinking into the mud

Regards all, time to phone and see what time Mrs Handy is going to be released

Did I ever tell you the tale 10.5 years ago...

Was down at Ma's (sarf) and slipped on the ice putting rollie butts on the buddlia....

Spent about 5 mins yelling and in agony with a dislocated knee before Ma finds me....

This being New Year's eve it was a trip to A+E @ 9.30am (no I wasn't drunk )....3 hours later get out....trip back on the Wednesday and I annouce of had enough of Ma and am deffo going back on the trek north the next day (utterly laden pre sticks)

Get to Grantham (this was pre the days of Ma picking me up @ P'boro - had to change @ Grantham York & ?Ed?) - train cancelled...

Next train is direct up north...

I had to think....cigs (you could smoke on the train then) or buffet...Buffet won!!!

But I ended up the first class side of it as I tried to line myself up. :

Guard took one look at me and gave me a free upgrade

Even got free food when delayed @ N'castle...

Of course I had no mobile then so Ma was having kittens by the time I got home..

I was like 'chill...been in 1st class since grantham

SC

[Angelic]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

I love snow! The more the better. We had snow for months last year and it was great. For nearly a week nothing at all could get in or out of our village. Really brought the community alive! Brilliant stuff.

You're all mad...

[Handyman]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

You're all mad...

Must seem that way to you Angelic. It's easy to say you like Snow when you live in the Sarf. The first year we were here the locals told me they had not had snow for 20 years. Sitting here in the shade 27 degrees outside its easy to like. Ask me again in February
after a day out in the garden dodging sleet and hail and I will probably deny I ever started this topic

Regards Handy.

[Angelic]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Must seem that way to you Angelic. It's easy to say you like Snow when you live in the Sarf. The first year we were here the locals told me they had not had snow for 20 years. Sitting here in the shade 27 degrees outside its easy to like. Ask me again in February
after a day out in the garden dodging sleet and hail and I will probably deny I ever started this topic

Regards Handy.

We had nearly 4ft of the bloody stuff last winter and it just wouldn't f00k off!! There were people trapped in their cars for hours and hours on the M8 (some abandoned them to walk home ) and deliveries to Tesco were few and far between.

I love it when folk down Sarf start freaking when they get an inch of the stuff, in fact, I seen Manchester on the news after they'd declared a 'state of emergency' and it just looked like someone had sprinkled icing sugar on the pavement

Or that bloody Boris who called London to a standstill because an inch of snow...you're all pure mad!!

[Handyman]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Hi all, well another typical Handy day. First off Lady Hooray said the inside lift wasn't working and was making a beeping sound. Now a few years ago when they had an extension built to the hall they had lifts put inside and out so the Old Lord could cope without having to tackle all the steps. Even though the old chap has been gone for nearly a year the lifts are in daily use because her Ladyship is too lazy to carry her shopping up the steps.

I checked all the fuse boxes and they were alright. Now the extension was so big we had to have a 400 volt industrial supply fitted. Without being technical when a fuse from the mains blows you don't lose all the power. I had to move tins of polish, dusters, Hoovers and more to take the cover off the fuse board to check it. (I once was an Electrician - another of Handy's skills).
When I was sure it wasn't us I contacted the South Western Electricity to report the fault. Funny on the emergency numbers on their website it lists every other companies number except their own. There's is listed under Merseyside (300 miles away).
I took pains to point out the mistake when I spoke to the reporting center.

It was only an hour before the repair gang arrived. I took them up the woods to where the transformer is mounted on a wooden pylon. Its easy when you know what to look for. An 11000 volt fuse was hanging from one of the wires.

One chap said I can't see any Blood spatters Wow I said what would cause that. Blessed Squirrels he said, little blighters like climbing the poles. When they reach over to tightrope the cable, Boom KerPlowee. If we are lucky we might find the tail, we get two or three like this a week.

As it happened it wasn't a Squirrel that caused the problem but a faulty batch of 11,000 volt Chinese fuses from a few years ago. Eventually the rain washes the insulating cement away, then boom your lights go out.

This meant another team with a cherry picker and men in rubber suits had to come out to change the fuses. They don't turn the power off while they work on the live wires. They call these chaps the Hot Glove Team. I have seen what happens when you touch these cables, if it can vapourise a Squirrel imagine what it can do to a person.

Before they had finished I had to go and collect Mrs Handy. When I finally got parked at the Hospital, then to the ward. I found out that they had her waiting for me in another department.

It was then home through what passes as the rush hour down here in Scrumpy Land. 5 miles at the back of a tractor doing 5 miles an hour with a driver who doesn't know what laybye's are for and 200 other vehicles trying to get past.

When we finally got home the electric was still off. It was another hour before the chaps finished the repairs.

I then had to re-set the lifts, the alarms and all the time clocks in the hall.

Lady Hooray said well Handy you haven't done much today. I htink you will have to Work Saturday Morning to play Catch up.

Now agreed I'm not the sort to ask payment for work I haven't done. Collecting Mrs H took 2 1/4 hours. Finding the Fault took another 2 hours, and an hour to re-set things.

If I was just another Handyman, she would have had to get a Lift Engineer £100 call out. He would have seen there wasn't any power and called in a local Sparky £ 35.00 per hour. Then she would have had to report the fault. Then call in the Lift Engineer again, another £100.00. I cost her a third of that per day, and she moans if I finish 5 minute early. I will be having words soon. I have a feeling a move may be immanent.

Somewhere North, possibly with Snow. At least people appreciate talent and a bargain North of Watford.

BTW. Mrs H is not too bad. Still sore but frightened enough by what has happened to take it steady for a few days. I have hid the iron. Cant stand creases in my Y Fronts anyway.

Regards all, Handy.

[swanfan]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Think i might have told Lady H to shove her job where the sun don't shine Handy.

[Numpty Monkey]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

If and when, you do come to your sences and move,
take a few fuses, reset a few clocks to northern time


Glad Mrs Handy is doing better

[Handyman]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Don't worry mates, when its time to move I have a couple of bags of quick drying cement that's going to give the septic tanks indigestion. I will leave a long lasting reminder of my time here and that's only one of many tricks up my sleeve. I did think about replacing the Green fly mix with Weed Killer.

I put half of the services in place here, some I keep patching up with running repairs. I'm not a bitter sort but I learned a long time ago Don't get Mad, Get Even.

Anyway Numpty how are you doing?, don't see much of you these days.
How's your Mum?.

I have cancelled a trip Oop North to see my Mother until Mrs H is better. How do you fancy a pint? when I can arrange it.

Regards, Handy.

[Johanino]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

We had nearly 4ft of the bloody stuff last winter and it just wouldn't f00k off!! There were people trapped in their cars for hours and hours on the M8 (some abandoned them to walk home ) and deliveries to Tesco were few and far between.

I love it when folk down Sarf start freaking when they get an inch of the stuff, in fact, I seen Manchester on the news after they'd declared a 'state of emergency' and it just looked like someone had sprinkled icing sugar on the pavement

Or that bloody Boris who called London to a standstill because an inch of snow...you're all pure mad!!

Precisely LOL

Hi all, well another typical Handy day. First off Lady Hooray said the inside lift wasn't working and was making a beeping sound. Now a few years ago when they had an extension built to the hall they had lifts put inside and out so the Old Lord could cope without having to tackle all the steps. Even though the old chap has been gone for nearly a year the lifts are in daily use because her Ladyship is too lazy to carry her shopping up the steps.

I checked all the fuse boxes and they were alright. Now the extension was so big we had to have a 400 volt industrial supply fitted. Without being technical when a fuse from the mains blows you don't lose all the power. I had to move tins of polish, dusters, Hoovers and more to take the cover off the fuse board to check it. (I once was an Electrician - another of Handy's skills).
When I was sure it wasn't us I contacted the South Western Electricity to report the fault. Funny on the emergency numbers on their website it lists every other companies number except their own. There's is listed under Merseyside (300 miles away).
I took pains to point out the mistake when I spoke to the reporting center.

It was only an hour before the repair gang arrived. I took them up the woods to where the transformer is mounted on a wooden pylon. Its easy when you know what to look for. An 11000 volt fuse was hanging from one of the wires.

One chap said I can't see any Blood spatters Wow I said what would cause that. Blessed Squirrels he said, little blighters like climbing the poles. When they reach over to tightrope the cable, Boom KerPlowee. If we are lucky we might find the tail, we get two or three like this a week.

As it happened it wasn't a Squirrel that caused the problem but a faulty batch of 11,000 volt Chinese fuses from a few years ago. Eventually the rain washes the insulating cement away, then boom your lights go out.

This meant another team with a cherry picker and men in rubber suits had to come out to change the fuses. They don't turn the power off while they work on the live wires. They call these chaps the Hot Glove Team. I have seen what happens when you touch these cables, if it can vapourise a Squirrel imagine what it can do to a person.

Before they had finished I had to go and collect Mrs Handy. When I finally got parked at the Hospital, then to the ward. I found out that they had her waiting for me in another department.

It was then home through what passes as the rush hour down here in Scrumpy Land. 5 miles at the back of a tractor doing 5 miles an hour with a driver who doesn't know what laybye's are for and 200 other vehicles trying to get past.

When we finally got home the electric was still off. It was another hour before the chaps finished the repairs.

I then had to re-set the lifts, the alarms and all the time clocks in the hall.

Lady Hooray said well Handy you haven't done much today. I htink you will have to Work Saturday Morning to play Catch up.

Now agreed I'm not the sort to ask payment for work I haven't done. Collecting Mrs H took 2 1/4 hours. Finding the Fault took another 2 hours, and an hour to re-set things.

If I was just another Handyman, she would have had to get a Lift Engineer £100 call out. He would have seen there wasn't any power and called in a local Sparky £ 35.00 per hour. Then she would have had to report the fault. Then call in the Lift Engineer again, another £100.00. I cost her a third of that per day, and she moans if I finish 5 minute early. I will be having words soon. I have a feeling a move may be immanent.

Somewhere North, possibly with Snow. At least people appreciate talent and a bargain North of Watford.

BTW. Mrs H is not too bad. Still sore but frightened enough by what has happened to take it steady for a few days. I have hid the iron. Cant stand creases in my Y Fronts anyway.

Regards all, Handy.

And how is Mrs H this am? I have fluid everywhere (okay exaggeration LOL - knees and ankles) from jogging and a turnigy accucel 6 charger that keeps beeping connection problems

Don't worry mates, when its time to move I have a couple of bags of quick drying cement that's going to give the septic tanks indigestion. I will leave a long lasting reminder of my time here and that's only one of many tricks up my sleeve. I did think about replacing the Green fly mix with Weed Killer.

I put half of the services in place here, some I keep patching up with running repairs. I'm not a bitter sort but I learned a long time ago Don't get Mad, Get Even.

Anyway Numpty how are you doing?, don't see much of you these days.
How's your Mum?.

I have cancelled a trip Oop North to see my Mother until Mrs H is better. How do you fancy a pint? when I can arrange it.

Regards, Handy.

How far up north are you coming Handy? Can meet you in edinburger but not this week as OD is rather sick. However giro next tuesday so am game ....would be lovely to have an Ed meet up or even N'castle (not that I know N'castle) or Durham (prettier) or Darlington (refuse to go any further sarf...will take me all day)

Anyhow just at training scheme in pain etc....

So let me know when you resign from the dictator that is Lady........

SC

[Numpty Monkey]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Don't worry mates, when its time to move I have a couple of bags of quick drying cement that's going to give the septic tanks indigestion. I will leave a long lasting reminder of my time here and that's only one of many tricks up my sleeve. I did think about replacing the Green fly mix with Weed Killer.

I put half of the services in place here, some I keep patching up with running repairs. I'm not a bitter sort but I learned a long time ago Don't get Mad, Get Even.

Anyway Numpty how are you doing?, don't see much of you these days.
How's your Mum?.

I have cancelled a trip Oop North to see my Mother until Mrs H is better. How do you fancy a pint? when I can arrange it.

Regards, Handy.

my mam is doing the okey cokey with the hospital
In last Sunday out last Wednesday, back in on Sunday and still in
and thats just the last 2 weeks

I'm up for a beer when your up this way mate
the way it's been going the last few months, maybe in the pub outside the hospital, I usually know where i'll be on a Sunday

[5corpio]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Beer on Drip! Mmmm

[Handyman]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Hi all, Hi Numpty and SC. I was planning on being up in the next 2 weeks but that was before the missus got plastered

its 2 weeks before she goes back to the Hospital, so it will be that long at least.

SC, I won't be going any further than Numptyland (he has a place named after him ) but I am trying to organise a meet with my old mate maggot later this year. It would be great to do another RAF MRT (That's Mountain Rescue Team) reunion. We used to hold them in Aviemore, last I heard they were now in Newtonmore. Now if you fancy having a few bevys with a bunch of septuagenarian's that think they are still teenagers, then I will sort an invite. You will probably wonder how we have all lasted this long without getting sectioned.

Well today was wet as forecast. Lady Hooray took it personally as her forecast said it wouldn't rain until Wednesday.

The Pish heads Luncheon guests turned up at 12:30 and didn't leave till 5.

One of them thought the Bar-B-Q was still going ahead and turned up in pink cords and a blue Hawaiian shirt. Now there is something not right about being 70 and dressing in pink trousers, unless your name is Tarquin Farquarhason (or Quentin Crisp)

Anyway the atmosphere is still the same, I spent the morning doing lift repairs, De-icing a 30 year old Fridge (well it worked Ok when I lived in Nigeria) (in the days of the colonys).

She even complained that the power cut had damaged it when Southern Electric made a courtesy Call. They even promised her compensation for it. Ballcocks it was on a different circuit. It hasn't been defrosted for years. Then is was a soaked to the skiddys job to take down a perfectly good tree that was blocking her view. 15 ft ladder and chainsaw job. Then she looked askance at me when I told her I was going to finish 15 minute early to get into dry clothes.

Handy has had a couple of glasses of Anti Freeze tonight, but I promise to tell you soon why I put up with it and how we ended up here.

Regards all, Handy

[Johanino]

Re: Hooray Hall. Adventures of a Handyman.

Okay so is this Aberdeenshire or like Invernesshire Handy..

And where are you all planning on staying? I can get a bed anytime (near enough) in Inverness ....and also Aberdeen...

So let me know and I'll be there with my whip and pink handcuffs for you all tee hee (not!!!!)

You know I'm away in about 2 weeks backpacking with Ma (it's her first time backpacking and she's over 60...that's something for Lady...hostelling ).....

And I still have fluid and it's been snakes all day....

Receptionish is getting a little concerned ...I said I'll self treat till Tuesday


Hope you weren't drinking the anti freeze...it's not the best medicine to apply to self.... Or unless you mean some ancient brand of vodka that was made in the time of Noah LOL

SC