Nowt as daft as folk

[findingaway]

After laughing my way through last night at Handys tales I startd to think of the daft things that real people i've known have done ...so thought i'd start a thread & we can all give each other a laugh ok i'll go first

A looong time ago i used to do cosmetic parties, they involved going to peoples homes doing the party then getting further bookings & so on, so some of the same people used to turn up at the next one. At party no 1 i noticed that one lady in particular was hanging onto my every word, sat really quiet listening, the spiel went on "this is our best selling face cream, a real indulgence with real results in only a couple of weeks - we call it food for the face"

Fast forward 4 wks (2 wks after 1st order delivered) same lady there still listening avidly me thinking she's gonna put another big order in.she stayed quiet again then i got to the face cream, in middle of spiel i heard a little mutter, "doesn't work" i tried to see who'd said it - no inclination, a bit unnerved (i'd never been heckled before! ) i carried on, then a louder voice chimed out "a waste of money it doesn't work" this time i couldn't help but notice it was the quiet lady, my prev best customer! I asked her why she thought that as we'd had really good feedback, "well" she says "it only lasted a week & it's not made any difference to my face" i asked her how oftn she'd used it she replied " twice a day like you said - some for my breakfast & some for my supper" Food for the face - she'd eaten it!!!









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[LooLoo]

Re: Nowt as daft as folk

Very funny.............. that had me spitting my coffee out!

Mr Looloo and I were shopping and we picked up some Ironing Water - you know the nice smelling one that you put in your iron to make all you washing smell lush whilst you iron. We had picked up the sainsburys own one - so one was Lychee and ons Pommegrante and something.

So we got to the cashier - young girl. She put our stuff through and said - O Iron Water - where is that? So I said over with all the Laundry stuff. O she said I might get some - does it taste nice?

I said... erm love you don't drink it you put in your iron..........

If she had could've gone red she would have - she was mortified she said - O I am a bit anemic so I thought if you drunk it, it might help. By this time Mr Loo and I could hardly stand up as were were laughing so much.

I said omg DON'T DRINK IT. She then asked us to shut up as everyone would now what a div she was being. Everytime I see her I still have to laugh!!

[Gerry]

Re: Nowt as daft as folk

C'mon fess up loo, were you sitting ready with paper & pen waiting for name of miracle face cream???

Gerry x x

[LooLoo]

Re: Nowt as daft as folk

C'mon fess up loo, were you sitting ready with paper & pen waiting for name of miracle face cream???

Gerry x x

I wanted it for my morning toast!

[Gerry]

Re: Nowt as daft as folk

I wanted it for my morning toast!

Better with the devil you know stick to your S & G.

[findingaway]

Re: Nowt as daft as folk

Yay gerry's back!! Just know you must have a tale or hundred.......
Don't think we're posh enough for iron water oop north, just have to manage with good old corporation pop! Funny story looloo - keep em coming peeps.

[Gerry]

Re: Nowt as daft as folk

Yay gerry's back!! Just know you must have a tale or hundred.......
Don't think we're posh enough for iron water oop north, just have to manage with good old corporation pop! Funny story looloo - keep em coming peeps.

We've got top quality water up here we can drink it right oot the stream, we couldn't possibly lower our standards with that bottled iron stuff our equipment is not used to the rough stuff.

Gerry

[Handyman]

Re: Nowt as daft as folk

I love the Idea of this thread, Heres my contribution.

The Burke Brothers.

Years ago when I was a Service Engineer working for a Firm that hired Welding machines, I used to charge from one end of the country to the other to keep them working.

On one site in South Wales were two brothers named Burke (Real Names). These two guys did x-ray quality welding and could earn up to 1K per day, at the time they were classed in the top 10 in the country.

One Friday at 11 o’clock I got a call from the site engineer, Handy he said I’m having problems with the Burke Brothers welding sets. I need you on site now. I asked if the site Sparks (Electrician) could check it first as 1 it was Friday and 2 I was in South Yorkshire.

No he said his chap had left early for the weekend. So off I went. 4 Hours later West of Cardiff I was crawling around the inside of a Power Station Boiler 180 feet in the air in a maze of pipe work.

These chaps were welding a pipe 9 inches thick and 3 feet in diameter. The pipe was covered in electric blankets to keep the metal glowing red hot at 400 degrees. Some might say Hell was a better place to work.

Now the machines were several hundred feet from where they were working and the power was set by a remote control unit, (a box with a knob).

What’s up I asked the younger Brother. Well he said we just get going and my power goes down and down. I turn the juice up on my remote but nothing happens. Now my Brother over on the other side of the pipe has the opposite problem. His Juice goes up and up and when he turns his remote down nothing happens. We stop for a minute mess with the settings and things go all right till we alter the power again.

I looked at the birds nest of cables, can I have your remote I asked. I picked it up and handed it to his brother. Can I have yours I asked him, then past it back to the first chap.

Sorted now I said. Write your names on them and don’t bl**dy mix them up again.

Just goes to prove, you can be as thick as a plank and still earn good money if your lucky enough to be in the right place.

I wouldn’t know, my names Handy.

[LooLoo]

Re: Nowt as daft as folk

Such apt names Handy!

[findingaway]

Re: Nowt as daft as folk

Thanks for the giggle handy, keep 'em coming........FAW