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  • #16
    Re: Son and elderly father

    Originally posted by PlanB View Post
    There's no doubt that you're a good Mum to your Son, and a good Daughter to your Dad. They're both lucky to have you

    There is no doubt in what PlanB has said about you cym.....I just came across this thread of yours and am so so sorry to hear what you are going through and still have the time to read all the bollocks I post up on my thread....and you have given me so much support and encouragement to.....so please do not feel sad.

    It is great that you have posted up what you are going through as it helps so much and you have lots of friends on here who will listen and care. Even if you just want to off load a stressful day.

    My god.....if I could off load all my stress on my thread my bloody keyboard would blow up

    You are doing a fantastic job and coping very well despite what you are going through....and as PlanB said this will all pass soon....just hang in there....and the best thing on this site is we are allowed to swear and Niddy won't say anything....the reason why is he swears more than all of us so fuck it!!!!!!!

    Your a good Mum...daughter and a lovely person for doing what you do...and have done....keep it up....as things will only get better...you'll see.....
    Last edited by transformer999; 14 June 2012, 15:58.

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    • #17
      Re: Son and elderly father

      Originally posted by jon1965 View Post
      Am I the only person who doesn't do dope..it makes me ill
      Ok so i have just bought two bottles of fruit flavoured Vodka (thank you Santander and Tesco)

      By the way I do understand, I had the horrible drunk/depressed/suicidal/drug addict and thieving stepson when I was in my late 20's and early 30's

      Hi jon....your not the only person who doesn't take dope....I don't take it either....well not yet that is...things carry on the way they are I may just change my mind

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      • #18
        Re: Son and elderly father

        Well I am no longer a daughter. Dad died in his sleep during the night, the weather in Cornwall matches my feeling wild, windy and wet!
        There is a backlog at the crematorium, so I may be here for over a week.

        Just to keep things going, dear son has been rolled in Ibiza and lost his iPhone and wallet! He doesn't know about dad as he won't cope very well.
        Youngest son is going on a school trip to Germany so he will miss the funeral; I have told him to go as mum has died he won't be upsetting anyone.
        I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

        If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

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        • #19
          Re: Son and elderly father

          so sorry to hear about your loss cym,......big hug and kisses to you at your time of sadness

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          • #20
            Re: Son and elderly father


            He is gone



            You can shed tears that he is gone
            Or you can smile because he has lived
            You can close your eyes and pray that he will come back
            Or you can open your eyes and see all that he has left
            Your heart can be empty because you can't see him
            Or you can be full of the love that you shared
            You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday
            Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday
            You can remember him and only that he is gone
            Or you can cherish his memory and let it live on
            You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back
            Or you can do what he would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.


            David Harkin (1959 - )


            If I should go tomorrow


            If I should go tomorrow
            It would never be goodbye,
            For I have left my heart with you,
            So don't you ever cry.
            The love that's deep within me,
            Shall reach you from the stars,
            You'll feel it from the heavens,
            And it will heal the scars.
            Last edited by transformer999; 14 June 2012, 18:16.

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            • #21
              Re: Son and elderly father

              If I should go before the rest of you
              Break not a flower nor inscribe a stone
              Nor when I'm gone speak in a Sunday voice
              But be the usual selves that I have known
              Weep if you must
              Parting is hell
              But life goes on
              So sing as well.



              I am so sorry to hear your news.
              I never really understood how much it hurts to lose a parent until I lost my dad
              I do hope your son in Ibiza can hold it together

              Comment


              • #22
                Re: Son and elderly father

                Awww, honey I am so sorry to hear the sad news. I feel for you, my heart and thoughts are with you, and we are here to talk anytime.

                Reading through you're posts (so sorry for not being here earlier) you have had a very hectic time of it, and in so many ways reminded me of my life. I see you're beloved dad suffered an amount of illnesses, again just like my own dad, many of them the same too, including dementia, and I can only say that I know exactly what you've been through, and whenever you feel like a chat, please do feel free to get in touch with me.

                Thinking of you xxxxx

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                • #23
                  Re: Son and elderly father

                  You have been such a strength and support to so many on this site let us help you now in your time of need.
                  Love and thoughts are with you Cym xxx

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                  • #24
                    Re: Son and elderly father

                    I'm thinking of you Cym, have a good howl then try to think about all the good times.
                    You know there isn't any other option but time to heal from this, I think once you realise this it makes it easier, it won't be tomorrow or the next day but there will be a time you can look back and smile, try and aim for that to get you through the next couple of weeks.

                    Son really needs to man up, does he want to come home but too proud to say?

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                    • #25
                      Re: Son and elderly father

                      Cym, there's nothing I can say that will ease the pain of losing your beloved father. Regardless of everything some of the younger members of your family are currently doing to test your patience, you seem to be a close and loving team, and hopefully that will help you get through this difficult time.

                      My thoughts are with you

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                      • #26
                        Re: Son and elderly father

                        Thank you for all your kind thoughts. The person who died was no longer dad but there are some great memories of us as a family and of all the things that dad did for us.
                        We are now trying to find Welsh hymns that everyone can sing, not just me and my sister, so it will limited to Cwm Rhondda, or Bread of Heaven for the English heathens

                        As for son, he was coming home but now isn't! However lack of contact means I can't cancel the phone number or do anything about insurance claims etc. I love him
                        Last edited by cymruambyth; 15 June 2012, 17:07.
                        I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                        If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          Re: Son and elderly father

                          Originally posted by cymruambyth View Post

                          As for son, he was coming home but now isn't! However lack of contact means I can't cancel the phone number or do anything about insurance claims etc. I love him
                          Contact him through Facebook ? His brothers may be allowed access - parents are generally banned from such invasion of their space

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                          • #28
                            Re: Son and elderly father

                            He can message me but I'm not allowed any insight to him . Trouble is without iPhone he has to go somewhere for the Internet!
                            I have texted his friend to try and get contact!
                            I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                            If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

                            Comment


                            • #29
                              Re: Son and elderly father

                              How can I be so grown up about everything and having poured dry ginger in to my gin I' m bawling my eyes out because dad loved dry ginger?
                              I must need more gin!
                              I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                              If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

                              Comment


                              • #30
                                Re: Son and elderly father

                                Originally posted by cymruambyth View Post
                                How can I be so grown up about everything and having poured dry ginger in to my gin I' m bawling my eyes out because dad loved dry ginger?
                                I must need more gin!
                                My Mum's favourite tipple was brandy and ginger and I hated the stuff. But whenever I see someone with a glass of Remy Martin in their hand I think of her (she's been gone over 20 years now). It's nice to have these little personalized memories. Add more gin and raise a toast to your dear Dad

                                And let that puppy do its worst because this is a time when you should be drowning your sorrows if you feel like it
                                Last edited by PlanB; 15 June 2012, 18:56.

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