How much should l ask dtr to pay?

[swanfan]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

PS NOTE TO SELF - never move in with IF

Also not much chance of breakfast in bed, lunch maybe...

[IF]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

PS NOTE TO SELF - never move in with IF

Tough love Loo, tough but with loads of love too!!

[LooLoo]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

That sounds fair Flo

I always had to pay my keep at home and i think it is right to do so. I do know many parents that take the board and put in a savings but the fact it the child never knew they were doing this so thought that they were still contributing to the house and had a nice suprise when they moved out!!

My parents could NO WAY afford to do that so I never minded and as people have said it gets you thinking about money and budgeting at a young age.

good luck

xx

PS NOTE TO SELF - never move in with IF

[flo5]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

Thanks for all the comments -

l have decided to keep a record of all the expenditure for her for a week, so she can see were the money goes. Obviously some things will be a rough guide but l want to highlight to her that costs add up and maybe forgoing one designer top a week might be necessary!

My husband and l have agreed £20 per week and she pays for her own mobile phone - will see how this works.

Thanks again

Flo5

[SXGuy]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

I was only saying that because if she rents somewhere, she would have to pay for bills,rent and food and she'd be lucky to have half her wages left over then!!

Where would you be able to rent including food and bills for £120 per week, let alone half of it lol.

I think £20 per week is about right, £80 - 100 a month is plenty.

[IF]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

how much

OK maybe it was a bit much, but I paid my Mum half my wage when I left School!!

[Never-In-Doubt]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

I think £25pw is fine. If she argues ask her to go buy her own food for a week and see what it costs.

That ought to convince her - unless she can live on a milkshake a day

[flo5]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

Thanks to everyone who took the time to post a comment.

We asked for £25.00 per week and she is horrified. This is my fourth daughter and all of her siblings have "contributed" ( she has an older sister who willingly contributes £25 per week) partly as l feel that she should contribute to the expenses as she is having the privileges, and it helps her learn that you have to pay your way in the real world.

Secondly our finances dictate that we have to budget very carefully.

One of her sisters moved out a few weeks ago from our home (along with her husband and their dtr) . Who were also meant to contribute and basically failed to do so so for many months ( another long story).

I do not want to make the same mistake again.

Thank you all again, your comments have been varied and l welcome the different prospectives.

Something to sleep on - or ponder over at 3 in the morning when l cannot sleep!

Flo5

[Never-In-Doubt]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

Hi Flo, I think you should ask for £50 a week everything all in. She won't get this deal anywhere else and will help her budget for when she finally moves into her own place.

IF...x

how much

[Never-In-Doubt]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

I never charged board either, not something I believe in personally but based on £120 take home, and her young age and need to live some life I would say £25 per week or £100 per month is a nominal sum for 'digs' or whatever word you call it.

I chose never to charge it, cos really we don't need it and being both my girls are spoiled anyway, it wouldn't have done anything cos they'd have done the same 'daddeeeeeeee' sad eye look and I'd have let em off regardless.

Lose / Lose to most dads when dealing with daughters.

planB- agree. Would love our eldest to move back (but not with her bf in tow of course )

[PlanB]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

I'd pay my daughter £50 per week to move back in with me - I miss her terribly

[PriorityOne]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

Hmmmm..... tricky one this.

I can still remember having to pay a huge chunk of my very first salary in "housekeeping" and the result of this was that it took years and years to get on my feet.

My own daughter now is at uni. but when she leaves and starts working, I won't be taking a whack from her for housekeeping because:

a) I want her to have a life before settling down and having kids, and

b) I would rather she and her boyfriend live between the 2 houses, save money by paying much less than they would in rent.... and in doing so, allow themselves the chance to save for a deposit on a property.

Circumstances are different in every household but that's my view anyway... I will of course be taking something but not a huge amount.

[MrsD]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

I take 10% of gross pay as my DD is self-employed in the theatre, so sometimes work ain't really there. I expect her to help run the house and she buys her own toiletries extras etc. You should take something, my DS got quite a shock about costs when he moved in to flat recently, the price of gas and electricity shocked him a lot while he was at home it never used to occurr to him to turn anything off, he sure does now though

[helmsman]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

Have a predicament and thought l would ask the wise people their opinions!

One of my daughters recently started her first job, it is only part time earning about £120 per week (does have opportunity for overtime of a least a few hours a week)

A) Should l ask her to contribute to the household expenses?

B) How much should l ask?

While l feel she should contribute as she makes full use of gas,elec, washing, food etc. She says l am being unreasonable. I have explained the cost of things and shown her bills. I do not expect her to hand over all her wages but do feel that she should contribute.

Would welcome comments, if you do not agree, l would appreciate if you could explain the rationale behind not agreeing.

Thanks for taking time to read this.

Regards

Flo5

Hi Flo5,
Well I am a soft touch(not a judge on the voice) I have 4 children 2 off each thank goodness 2 girls have cost nothing 2 boys have and expect us to bail them out all the time I am talking thousands of £s so start as you mean to go on or believe me you will regret not being strong in the furure.

[pompeyfaith]

Re: How much should l ask dtr to pay?

My Son earns roughly the same as he is doing one of these Government apprenticeships that are nothing of the sort we did as teenagers.

As he has to pay travel expenses and other items like his clothing I have told him for now he pays the child benefit that my wife lost so he is paying £21 a week but he also knows as his wages increase so does his keep as this is very much a temporary supportive measure to help him stand on his own two feet.

School/college leavers of today have it a lot harder than us when jobs where in abundance.

Just my take hope it goes some way in helping you decide.