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Your Favourite One Liner Joke

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  • #16
    Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

    A pair of jump leads walks into a bar.

    The barman says,"I'll serve you, but don't start anything!"
    "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride"

    Comment

    • #17
      Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

      What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?




      It gets toad away.
      Last edited by Deepie; 8 July 2015, 16:28.
      I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

      If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

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      • #18
        Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

        First Christmas joke ......

        What is the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?


        Snowballs.
        I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

        If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

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        • #19
          Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

          I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been trippin' all day.
          "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride"

          Comment

          • #20
            Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

            Why are pirates called pirates?


            (They just arrrrrgh!)
            I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

            If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

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            • #21
              Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

              How much did the pirate pay for his hook and peg leg?





              (An arm and a leg!)
              I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

              If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

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              • #22
                Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

                The answer is: Cock Robin

                The question is: What's that in my a** Batman?

                Comment

                • #23
                  Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

                  Originally posted by Deepie View Post
                  How much did the pirate pay for his hook and peg leg?





                  (An arm and a leg!)





                  Originally posted by alland View Post
                  The answer is: Cock Robin

                  The question is: What's that in my a** Batman?
                  ALLAN!!!
                  "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride"

                  Comment

                  • #24
                    Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

                    How do you get Pikachu on a bus?

                    Pokémon
                    I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                    If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

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                    • #25
                      Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

                      Q: What do you call a computer that sings?

                      A: Adell
                      "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride"

                      Comment

                      • #26
                        Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

                        I tried to catch fog yesterday.....
                        Mist.

                        Comment

                        • #27
                          Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

                          Q: What do you get if you cross a centipede and a parrot?


                          A: A Walkie Talkie
                          "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride"

                          Comment

                          • #28
                            Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

                            I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.

                            But when I got home, all the signs were there.
                            I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                            If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

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                            • #29
                              Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

                              ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^


                              Q: Why do dragons sleep during the day?


                              A: So they can fight knights!
                              "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride"

                              Comment

                              • #30
                                Re: Your Favourite One Liner Joke

                                Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool.


                                I gave him a glass of water.
                                I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                                If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

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