Where do I begin - allegation of Housing Benefit fraud

[Up2MyEyes]

Re: Where do I begin

In answer to a couple of questions, my daughter is 4 years old. Attends a local nursery as she is due to start school in September.

Her only remaining grandparents live nearly 200 miles away and if I were to get a custodial sentence she would have to live with them. If I were to be given an electronic tag she won't be able to visit them though as I wouldn't be able to get home again within the same day (nightmare).

I also have a grandaughter who will be 2 in a few months from now.

Regarding offsetting benefits, I'm not entirely sure what this question means and I've read it a few times. If what I'm being asked is to do with working out any other benefits I may have been entitled to then the solicitors secretary has already started to make enquiry's about this with the relevant departments. If that isn't what I was being asked then I'm really sorry but didn't understand the question.

[SXGuy]

Re: Where do I begin

No thats fine, you answered the question

I wont confuse you any more, all i will say is it sounds like everything is being looked at properly, so dont worry.

Plus like i said earlier, i believe your daughters age and distance of next of kin plus having to move schools etc, would play a big role on whether a prison term would be given.

Of course dont quote me, but thats something you should def ask someone about.

[PlanB]

Re: Where do I begin

Did you get to meet your probation officer yet and how did that go You know you can usually ask for a replacement one if you feel the one allocated to you didn't 'get it'

I remember from your earlier posts that you had a psychiatrist supporting you at one point and maybe they would be willing to provide a report to the court to help you too

Please post up your progress so we can help you

[Up2MyEyes]

Re: Where do I begin

Thank you for you messages of support. I'm just functioning on auto pilot at the moment. Completely numb and oblivious to the world. Got my date for sentencing now which is 1st June (had been meant to be going to a festival with a large group of friends but having to pull out - £160 wasted on the tickets and camp fees but can't be in two places at once, much as I'd prefer to be at the other can't get out of it obviously)

Saw the Probation Officer, can't say it went too well. Neither the Solicitor nor the DWP had sent her the Basis of Plea (I previously posted it here) and as such she couldn't accept the copy I had taken with me as she had no proof that the Judge had accepted it, therefore was going to have to write her report on the charges from the DWP.

Kept asking me did I think I was guilty, did I understand what I'm guilty of and would I do it again and why I hadn't asked the questions years ago.

Erm well NO I don't really do think I'm guilty as I've been living as a single parent up till last year, not the period they are prosecuting me for. I didn't think to ask the questions years ago as there weren't questions to be asked about my boyfriend living here - BECAUSE HE DIDN'T, how could I ask a question and to who if there wasn't one to ask. I'd always been told that you could have someone stay up to 3 nights a week before being classed as living together, all well and good but there would often be times when he wouldn't even stay as much as 3 nights a month. The relationship worked for us and I would see him whenever he could visit. How could I ask the question and assume us as living together as at a minutes notice he may not have come back. Would I do it again, well in the same situation I still wouldn't have seen any other way of doing it. If I'd gone and said I've a boyfriend that lives nearly 200 miles away that sometimes comes to visit a couple of times a month, we've had the odd holiday of 3-4 nights away at a time but I sold him my house as it was about to get repossessed would that have made a difference. I've absolutely no idea. ANYBODY could have bought it from me if I could continue living in it, he just happened to be the only person in a postition at the time to be able to do it for me.

Spend two hours with the P.O. and then had to go back again for another 90 minutes as she wanted more information. Wanted to know what provision I've made for my daughter as, if I do get a custodial I will not be allowed home again to make the arrangements. Said I hoped it wouldn't be coming to that but she insisted that I have nursery and schools in that area already sorted out before I turn up on 1st.

Went for the Psychiatrict report (First time I've seen the actual consultant despite being under him for years and in their system since 1997) He couldn't work out what they were actually asking him for so don't pin my hopes on his report.

My Doctors report I'm pleased with as I do believe that gives the best description of me, so hoping that is read out.

P.O. rang this morning, she's struggling with what to write, still not heard from CPS or my solicitor so has no choice but to do it off the DWP case. GREAT!!!! She is really finding it difficult as I don't fit into any of her boxes. I'm not an alcoholic so can't do drink rehab, I'm not a drug user so can't do Drug rehab, I'm registered disabled so can't do digging roads or litter picking, or standing for periods of time ironing clothes in a charity shop. Offered to work on the till but wouldn't be allowed to as the charge is fraud. Suggested volunteering at the CAB or even stitching mail sacks but they aren't the agencies that they work with. Custodial is looking more and more likely - but she then was very quick to point out "Oh well it would only be 9 months wouldn't it" guess I should consider myself lucky eh.

Had letter from solicitor tail end of last week telling me to make an appointment as matter of urgency either Monday or Tuesday this week. Made if for Tuesday, juggled childcare, nursery collection and swimming lessons to get a phone call 90 mins before apt to say she hadn't come in after all and it would have to be next week. Is it me or should I just feel like I'm being fed to the lions den.

I'm still trying to get the rest of the character refs together I've asked everyone for but to be honest I've just about given up and had to resign myself to the fact that I'm going to be having a holiday at tax payers expense. There doesn't seem to be any light and I'm totally numb with it all. Not sleeping and when I saw my doctor yesterday to ensure I had enough tablets to see me over the next month or so he would only give me certain ones in quanity but refused to allow me any extra than the one month of antidepressants as he will not let me have more than that in the house at any one time (he used to let me have them on repeat of 2-3 months but now insists he sees me every single month).

Will try to keep this updated as much as possible but as you can appreciate, I feel sick with everything. My daughter is going up to her Grandparents (200 miles away) as from this weekend as she's starting to pick up on stress and keeps asking if she has been naughty and is going to jail or prison. What is jail or prison and we've been so careful not to say things around her. It's heart breaking I won't see her all next week but the worst is it could be nearly a year before I see her again after this weekend.

I'm going to sign off for now before I crumble yet again. Too much to do, need to get my house in order. Even been having to teach her dad how to put hair in a ponytail and plait it for school. Devastated

[Up2MyEyes]

Re: Where do I begin

No thats fine, you answered the question

I wont confuse you any more, all i will say is it sounds like everything is being looked at properly, so dont worry.

Plus like i said earlier, i believe your daughters age and distance of next of kin plus having to move schools etc, would play a big role on whether a prison term would be given.

Of course dont quote me, but thats something you should def ask someone about.

Been trying to get intouch with my solicitor to ask how this is going but if you have read my previous message you will know that she's as much use as a chocolate fireguard. With hindsight I would never have gone with her but far too late in the day to even consider jumping ship now. Hoping that I get chance to see her next week to find out these answers but not holding my breath with the way she's been so lax about the whole situation

[SXGuy]

Re: Where do I begin

i really cant believe the position you have been in, yes your right it does seem as though you have been fed to the lions, this is a blatant act of misjustice if i have ever seen one.

If you do get a chance to comment at the hearing, you really should point all these things out, it needs to be said, i dont know if it will help or harm your situation but someone with authority HAS to know the position you have been put in through no fault of your own.

I can see it would be easier to curl up and forget about the world right now than to face this head on, but please be strong, and i will be thinking of you and sending you my energy with my thoughts.

Please make sure that whatever happens, you dont give up on this, and you make sure everyone who needs to know, is told your story because this cant happen again, not to you, or anyone else.

A blatant misjustice, im disgusted at our legal system.

[transformer999]

Re: Where do I begin

My heart sinks to read such a sad story....and it makes my insides rage with fury at how the OP is and has been treated not only by her solicitor but also by the authorities and the social.

I know that words cannot describe the pain and fear you must be going through uptomyeyes right now and you have been very strong and brave by posting your story on here. You must feel that your world has come to a stand still and cannot see any hope in sight.

I am going through a divorce and repossession proceedings......and people like my OH who have committed open fraud...and not just on a small scale. It makes me sick to see people like him get away and not answer for what they did and continue to so...and then there are genuine people like your self....who through no fault of their own get sent to the gallows for something which in my opinion is absoloutley ridiculous.

For what it is worth all I want to say that no matter how hard and how down you must be feeling...please stay strong and keep it together. Sometimes when we believe that there is no hope left......hope finds us....and your life truly changes for the best. I say that as it happened to me....just when I thought everything was over...everything changed.

I wish you the very best of luck.....be brave...and look ahead with a view that maybe everything will not be as bad as you say...and then you can post back telling everyone your good news.

Take care and please keep posting as this will help you alot...trust me......you have my support.

[PlanB]

Re: Where do I begin

Right now you're feeling helpless but I'm going to suggest you do something that I know will help because I've seen it work: write to the judge yourself and/or get your Mum to write to the judge on your behalf. Go to www.sharp-uk.org/advice/write-to-the-judge for examples of letters written and why they have helped people to not get custodial sentances

Believe it or not under all those fancy wig and gowns judges are human beings with big hearts like the rest of us. Some are even cuddly mothers like you. I once saw a judge moved to tears when she was handed a letter from a litle girl which went "Dear Judge, Please don't send my Mummy to prison because I'll miss her bedtime stories and she kisses me better when I fall over". I'm getting all choked up just remembering it. Your daughter is probably too small to do this (and you should take advice on what she should be told about the current situation because whatever it is you should be the one telling her not anyone else late in the day). But your Mum could write a letter on her behalf (handwirtten works best because it looks more heartfelt than typed). Or maybe your oldest daughter would write one too - there's no limit on how many the Judge will read

The point is all the Judge is going to be allowed to do on June 1st is decide what sentance is appropriate for your crime. Sadly there's no putting the clock back on the guilty pleaded verdict. So focus on giving the judge reasons why you're not a risk to the public who needs to be locked up, and if you were to be it would harm other innocent people (ie your daughter). This would come over better from you as Mum than anything supportive your PO puts in thier report which will probably be supportive too

I really hope you read this post in time

[PlanB]

Re: Where do I begin

Why not also ring SHARP's helpline on 01743 245 365 because they may be able to help you to write a 'Family Impact Statement' for the court. This is a document presented to the Judge which co-ordinates the impact on the whole family structure if you were to be sent to prison. It will be considered by the court and could be the thing which most effects the Judge's decision. Please find the strength to at least ring them because you've still got time to get this done if you hurry and at least you'll feel you've given it your best shot for your little girl's sake and not relied completely on other officials to fight your battle. See, you're not helpless at all

[transformer999]

Re: Where do I begin

That must be the most sweetest advice if ever I have read PlanB.....you are right..I mean there is nothing to lose by doing what you have suggested and maybe the key thing to get the OP out of this mess.

Maybe these people need to concentrate on the real criminals and put them under the limelight...and think about the repercussions this will have on the small child. How sick it is read the sadness that some people go through.

Hang in there uptomyeyes....as we are all thinking of you....and lets hope that this matter is over soon with a happy ending.

PlanB......you are awesomeeeeeee excellent support and help you have given to the OP.

[PlanB]

Re: Where do I begin

The point is that Judges get all sorts of lowlife in front of them dressed in a smart suit and tie having ditched the hoddie and covered over the tattoos (nothing wrong with either of those things and it's what I advise my clients to do but but I'm just trying to make a point). They have no idea what's behind the "criminal" standing in front of them so they go with the paperwork from the solicitors and PO etc. Often the person doesn't even get to speak from themselves unless the Judge barks "So what have you got to say for yourself young man".

I want UpToMyEyes to realize that she does have a voice in court and it needs to be heard because we all believe she deserves a break

The buzz word is remorse. Always show remorse and say "sorry and I promise it won't happen again" because we all know that is what she is thinking and why she is feeling so miserable. But that can change when she takes control of her input

[Up2MyEyes]

Re: Where do I begin

Many thanks for putting me in touch with SHARP. I'd never even heard of the Family Impact Statement or the fact I could write to the judge myself. I'm in for a really busy weekend now trying to pen exactly how I feel about what's happened and how it came to it in the first place.

Totally understand what you mean about the judge not even knowing everything and also me not being given a chance to speak for myself either. Such a shame I couldn't sit down and chat with the judge explaining how I found myself in this mess in the first place and just how bad I feel about it. I had been coming through the brighter side of my depression but since this all began I've become somewhat of a recluse again to the detriment of my daughter as I used to take her to Sure Start groups 6 days a week, now we don't attend any as I don't have the confidence to take her anymore and don't like being out in public on my own.

It's been suggested that maybe my mother or another family member could write on behalf of my daughter as she can't yet write for herself but as I've lost both parents and don't have any other family I'm hoping that a friend could do it for her. I sound like such a loser with no family etc but unfortunately that's the hand I've been dealt in life and as my OH has been consantly reminding me - 12 months from now, whatever happens I can dust myself down and start all over again. Thankfully.

One bit of good news though (if I could call it good news as it gutted me to have to do it) I managed to sell the festival tickets and only lost £25 on them. Much better than losing £160 so guess that was a silver lining from somewhere. Next year I WILL be at that festival - NOTHING will stop me. :-)

[PlanB]

Re: Where do I begin

This is all good news Did you speak to a really nice guy at Sharp called David

You write well so it'll be no problem putting your thoughts and feelings down on paper. Anyone can write a letter for the Judge who knows your daughter and how close you guys are

My daughter's friend got busted for drugs at Glastonbury last summer so maybe staying away from festivals is not such a bad thing !

Please post up anytime to see what else we can add to help. You're sounding more positive now that you know you can do something about this situation and fight for your daughter's right to have a live-in Mummy. Why should she be punished for something she didn't do

[PlanB]

Re: Where do I begin

I've just had a thought. Would it make any sense for your OH to write a letter for the court. He knows you better than anyone else right now, and he could maybe explain the 'mix-up' over the HB claim since it involved him living with you and then moving away to live with his Mum which the DWP won't accept.

Since your case isn't going to trial (because you have already pleaded guilty) you haven't had a chance to present the court with any witnesses. If you had gone to trial your OH would probably have given a Witness Statement in support of your innocence. Perhaps this letter could be a second chance

It would probably be a good idea to check with a solicitor that he's not incriminating himself in any way if he decides to do this

[Up2MyEyes]

Re: Where do I begin

He's taken our daughter up to Nana's this morning. So hard saying goodbye to her and telling her that I will see her as soon as I can, with no idea of when that could be. Bless her she was wanting to know why I was crying just saying goodbye to her as usually it's not an issue. She kept calling me back to the car for "Just one more kiss".

When he gets back tomorrow we are going to get our heads together to write a family impact statement.