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  • #91
    Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

    Originally posted by PlanB View Post
    I'm not sure that warning WG that her daughter's ex may suddenly have a new baby
    I doubt that such would be biologically possible.

    Comment


    • #92
      Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

      Originally posted by PlanB View Post
      The really sad thing is Gary Barlow is already taken
      Who is Gary Barlow and for which football team does he play?

      Comment


      • #93
        Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

        Originally posted by PlanB View Post
        I would happily fall in love and marry again, and willingly put the deeds of my house in joint names too because I do believe in Happy Ever Afters - the trouble is I've not been asked yet
        I rather doubt you'd be quite desperate enough...

        Comment


        • #94
          Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

          Hi All!!!. Thank you All.

          I'm thinking I should be thanking you for all your kind words and help, point by point, but my granddaughter is off sick from school today and doesn't want me on the computer for long. I have thoroughly read all of the posts and skimmed through to refresh myself just now.

          I have talked about this with Dea-Dea. (The only thing she had a problem with, in the part she read, was the suggestion that her actual, official, ex-husband might present a problem. ) But she was pleased to see my comments. I don't think she's a "forum person"; she probably views it as overthinking and complicating matters.

          In the 10 months, since separating from her (recent) ex, she is now feeling stronger and more independent again. (She had a bit of a problem that accepting money from me to pay the bulk of the mortgage might equate to "livin' with yer mum" and envisages losing tax credits if I'm properly living here.)

          My daughter is adamant that she wants to stay in her current home. She is happy for me to pay off the bulk of the mortgage. She would like the balance of the mortgage in her sole name. She reckons might be happy with £5k to come off the deeds.

          To quote PriorityOne's words again:

          Originally posted by PriorityOne View Post
          The fact that no mortgage payments have been missed puts your daughter in an excellent position re. approaching the lender in her own right. I still think this is the first thing she (with you present) should do to find out whether this is a viable option or not. If/when you both go there, I'll give you a few pointers on what to say....
          ...... I found this reassuring.

          BUT ..... B*gg*r!!!! There was something I had over looked (though it has come up in conversations before) ..... The mortgage is with Cheltenham and Gloucester!!!! who are linked to Lloyds!!!!:

          Originally posted by WorriedGrandma View Post

          Type of account: Unsecured Loan of £15,000 from Lloyds TSB in daughter's name only

          Date commenced: Can't find date on CCA, but Nov/Dec 2006

          Approx balance: £8,500

          Date last paid full payment: May? 2010

          Joint DMP with ex with CCCS: £121 per month June 2010 to May 2011

          DMP with CCCS in daughter's sole name: £47 per month from August 2011

          Status: Letter Nov 2010 saying willing to accept £7500 as final settlement and show debt as "partially satisfied".
          Account owner: Lloyds TSB


          Type of account: Lloyds TSB overdraft joint names - daughter and ex both/each responsible for WHOLE debt

          Date commenced: overdrawn by around £2,500 - £3,000 since, at least June 2008.

          Approx balance: £2908

          Joint DMP with ex with CCCS: £64 per month June 2010 to May 2011

          DMP with CCCS in daughter's sole name: £25 per month from August 2011

          Status: Letter from SCM Solicitors, in October 2011, demanding the £33 "unplanned" overdraft (exceeding £3000 limit) - Formal Demand prior to commencement of legal proceedings. They are/were adding monthly fees, which sometimes exceeded £100, and gave the impression the account was being used. The account has not been used since around June 2010. A letter was sent, earlier this year, telling them the account was closed and asking that fees not be added.

          Account owner: Lloyds TSB
          Cheltenham and Gloucester's website states that, to make a capital payment off ones mortgage, one should go into a Lloyds branch.

          This might have something to do with our thoughts on needing to tackle the debt before the mortgage?

          But, anyway, reading on, I'm reassured that there might be other mortgage lenders who would be willing to make up the shortfall between my contribution and the balance outstanding.

          Though I am worried at the idea of being sucked into having to have dealings with Lloyds. The thing that has tended to bother me most over the past 4 years has been the amount of money spent on servicing the debts, due to astonomical interest, fees, charges. I really am loathed to let these vultures have the full amount they say is owing.

          Sorry this might be a bit garbled. Granddaughter has been chewing my ear off throughout.

          Comment


          • #95
            Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

            WG - hope little un is ok - and look the main thing is to remember there are options out there - and as P1 says it does depend on lenders and branches etc etc.

            Good luck with it all and just remember we are here

            x

            .

            Comment


            • #96
              Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

              Originally posted by WorriedGrandma View Post

              My daughter is adamant that she wants to stay in her current home. She is happy for me to pay off the bulk of the mortgage. She would like the balance of the mortgage in her sole name. She reckons might be happy with £5k to come off the deeds. . .

              Cheltenham and Gloucester's website states that, to make a capital payment off ones mortgage, one should go into a Lloyds branch.

              This might have something to do with our thoughts on needing to tackle the debt before the mortgage? .
              I have a CheltGlos mortgage and I can make overpayments through online banking. If it's a large sum you may need to go into a branch for money laundering reasons especially if the money is coming from a third party (it's not your mortgage). If your daughter doesn't have the same name as you the bank may want to see your identity such as a utility bill and passport/driving license.

              I was also told that sometimes (not always) you can come off the deeds of a property (i.e. Land Registry) without coming off the mortgage. This wouldn't impact on the lender's security so they may not mind. Check this out when you get a moment to talk to the free solicitor before you approach the lender.

              Someone else on here will guide you how to tackle the unsecured debts.

              Your daughter is lucky to have you helping her with all this. I know what a minefield it can be as a Mum with an independant daughter. Walking on eggshells doesn't even come close to describing the diplomatic efforts involved

              Comment


              • #97
                Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

                Originally posted by PlanB View Post
                I was also told that sometimes (not always) you can come off the deeds of a property (i.e. Land Registry) without coming off the mortgage. This wouldn't impact on the lender's security so they may not mind. Check this out when you get a moment to talk to the free solicitor before you approach the lender.

                Someone else on here will guide you how to tackle the unsecured debts.
                I knew I hadn't put that clearly.
                My fear is that, by approaching any company (in this case, Cheltenham and Gloucester) connected to Lloyds, with capital, to pay off the bulk of the mortgage, they're going to insist that the whole (including massive interest, fees and charges) of the unsecured loan and overdraft are paid out the money they see avaialble.

                Thank you, LooLoo (have I spelt that correctly?),

                Littl'un went down with a bit of a 'flu'ey thing on Sunday. She's much perkier today.
                Last edited by WorriedGrandma; 27 March 2012, 13:48. Reason: Addition

                Comment


                • #98
                  Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

                  Originally posted by WorriedGrandma View Post
                  I knew I hadn't put that clearly.
                  My fear is that, by approaching any company (in this case, Cheltenham and Gloucester) connected to Lloyds, with capital, to pay off the bulk of the mortgage, they're going to insist that the whole (including massive interest, fees and charges) of the unsecured loan and overdraft are paid out the money they see avaialble.
                  I don't see how they could since you don't owe them a bean. It's your money to do with it as you please. Surely it's none of their business how you decide to spend it

                  And since a mortgage is a negative balance (it's a debt) the bank can't try to offset any money you pay in towards anything your daughter may owe on a different account or loan. Once you've paid any of your money into the mortgage account the debt will have decreased but there's still a negative balance.
                  Last edited by PlanB; 27 March 2012, 13:54.

                  Comment


                  • #99
                    Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

                    Originally posted by PriorityOne View Post
                    I too was with my ex for a long time and we produced a wonderful child together...
                    Which bits did he make?

                    Comment


                    • Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

                      Originally posted by WorriedGrandma View Post

                      My daughter is adamant that she wants to stay in her current home. She is happy for me to pay off the bulk of the mortgage. She would like the balance of the mortgage in her sole name. She reckons might be happy with £5k to come off the deeds.
                      Ok.... so we know what we're working with now. You both need to approach the lender then to find out if they would consider a transfer of deeds (with the ex's agreement) if you put down a sizeable lump sum to reduce it upon transfer to sole ownership.... your daughter is working, payments are up-to-date and at the end of the day, the debt to them will be reduced by the capital payment you'll be making..... but not with the ex on the deeds. If they will not consider it, then ask them what they will consider.

                      If your daughter is adamant that she wants to remain in that house, then she'll have to fight for it and that may mean striking up a deal re. the loan and/or negotiating a deal with the ex (assuming it's joint).... but don't go in there talking about that because that's not what you're going in there for.... and even though they are lilnked, they are still seperate companies.

                      Originally posted by WorriedGrandma View Post

                      Cheltenham and Gloucester's website states that, to make a capital payment off ones mortgage, one should go into a Lloyds branch.


                      This might have something to do with our thoughts on needing to tackle the debt before the mortgage?
                      No... the mortgage is your priority here. The debts are in a DMP and are being dealt with anyway, so put them to one side and focus on the mortgage for the moment. That's the only thing you're going in there to discuss with them... and you will need to have that discussion with the manager; not with a mortgage clerk.

                      Just for reference, I'm pretty sure that if you made a capital repayment by cheque that they would cash it. After my mum passed away and left money to me, I paid a large amount off my mortgage by cheque and it was absolutely fine. Not everyone is able to physically get to a branch to do things.

                      Originally posted by WorriedGrandma View Post

                      Though I am worried at the idea of being sucked into having to have dealings with Lloyds. The thing that has tended to bother me most over the past 4 years has been the amount of money spent on servicing the debts, due to astonomical interest, fees, charges. I really am loathed to let these vultures have the full amount they say is owing.
                      I do understand this but sometimes you have to weigh things up against what you want out of a situation or in other words, which issue bothers your daughter the most?

                      Originally posted by PlanB View Post

                      I was also told that sometimes (not always) you can come off the deeds of a property (i.e. Land Registry) without coming off the mortgage. This wouldn't impact on the lender's security so they may not mind. Check this out when you get a moment to talk to the free solicitor before you approach the lender.
                      Yes, this is true. A friend of mine had a very complicated arrangement drawn up by a solicitor some years ago when her husband b*ggered off to Australia because the deeds and mortgage were in his name only. They were also married with two kids, so she had certain residency rights.... and the land was transferred to her but the mortgage remained with him. Very strange.... and very messy....

                      In Dea Dea's situation the deeds are joint and I very much doubt that the ex would agree to coming off the deeds.... while still maintaining liability for a mortgage debt, especially with a new girlfriend in tow.

                      Originally posted by WorriedGrandma View Post

                      My fear is that, by approaching any company (in this case, Cheltenham and Gloucester) connected to Lloyds, with capital, to pay off the bulk of the mortgage, they're going to insist that the whole (including massive interest, fees and charges) of the unsecured loan and overdraft are paid out the money they see avaialble.
                      We can assume all kinds of scenarios WG...but until you both go down there and discuss it, no-one knows what they will say.
                      Last edited by PriorityOne; 27 March 2012, 18:50.
                      Remember the mantra:
                      NEVER communicate by 'phone.

                      Send EVERYTHING by Recorded/Special Delivery
                      Keep a copy of EVERYTHING sent
                      Keep hold of EVERYTHING received

                      PriorityOne & CPUTR 2008 (ex P1 CAG CPUTR 2008)


                      I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                      If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

                      Comment


                      • Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

                        Originally posted by CleverClogs View Post
                        Which bits did he make?
                        Hmmm..... tricky....

                        She has my brains and his feet....

                        Remember the mantra:
                        NEVER communicate by 'phone.

                        Send EVERYTHING by Recorded/Special Delivery
                        Keep a copy of EVERYTHING sent
                        Keep hold of EVERYTHING received

                        PriorityOne & CPUTR 2008 (ex P1 CAG CPUTR 2008)


                        I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                        If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

                        Comment


                        • Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

                          Any updates WG?
                          Remember the mantra:
                          NEVER communicate by 'phone.

                          Send EVERYTHING by Recorded/Special Delivery
                          Keep a copy of EVERYTHING sent
                          Keep hold of EVERYTHING received

                          PriorityOne & CPUTR 2008 (ex P1 CAG CPUTR 2008)


                          I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                          If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

                          Comment


                          • Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

                            Originally posted by PriorityOne View Post
                            Any updates WG?
                            Afraid, not yet, PriorityOne. Thank you for asking.

                            My plan was that the two weeks of the school Easter Holidays (when I wasn't doing school-runs), were when I'd be at my home (that is being sold) to sort out what belongings need keeping, throwing away, etc. I decided that I would take my daughter down with me, last weekend, to help me assess it. I would then, on return on Monday, make an appointment with a solicitor (prior to speaking with the mortgage company).

                            As I said last week, my granddaughter was not so well, with the 'flu'/cough that has been going round. Last week, she wasn't too bad during the day, but was feverish and droopy during the evenings. She spent last Friday night at her Nan's. My daughter and I went to my home on Saturday. On Sunday morning, my granddaughter's dad phoned to say she was worse and wanted her mum. We came back to my daughter's home around Sunday lunchtime, and her dad delivered her in the afternoon.

                            On Monday she was breathing rapidly and noisily, with bluish lips and in distress. We took her to the GP, who put her on a nebuliser. Since then she has been on 4 hourly inhalers, antibiotics and 3 days of steroid tablets. She has been really poorly, though, yesterday, she was, also, extremely aggressive. We have omitted the last day of steroids, and she has spent much of today sleeping.

                            I'm afraid my granddaughter has been our sole concern, as we don't know how she'll be from one minute to the next. We hope to get back on track soon.

                            Comment


                            • Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

                              So sorry to read this WG..... my daughter suffered with chronic asthma as a young child and it can take over your life at times.

                              Hope she feels better soon :-)
                              Last edited by PriorityOne; 4 April 2012, 19:27. Reason: typo
                              Remember the mantra:
                              NEVER communicate by 'phone.

                              Send EVERYTHING by Recorded/Special Delivery
                              Keep a copy of EVERYTHING sent
                              Keep hold of EVERYTHING received

                              PriorityOne & CPUTR 2008 (ex P1 CAG CPUTR 2008)


                              I'm an official AAD Moderator and also a volunteer, here to help make the forum run smoothly. Any views or opinions are mine and not the official line of AAD. Similarly, any advice I have offered you is done so on an informal basis, without prejudice or liability. If in doubt seek advice from a qualified insured professional - Find a Solicitor or go to the National Probono Centre.

                              If you spot an abusive or libellous post then please report it by Clicking Here. If you need to contact me, for instance if I've issued you a warning, moved, edited or deleted your post, please send me a message by clicking my username.

                              Comment


                              • Re: Want help/advice with daughter's debts please.

                                Hope she is better soon.

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