MS and depression - debt getting bigger

[cymruambyth]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

Sorry to hear that your cousin has been so ill, hopefully things are starting to improve. Health and members of the family are always the priority over financial matters.

[Pixie]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

Family and health come first...anything else can wait.

[Undercover Elsa]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

Dear me, so sorry to hear this, hope your cousin improves soon xxxx

[nanna58]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

xx

[Undercover Elsa]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

Just wondered how things are now AS...are you OK?
Elsa x

[alwaysskint]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

So sorry, have only just seen this Elsa.

Have had the worst year in a long time
My cousin sadly lost her battle with MS in August, my aunt and uncle are still really struggling with the way things happened, and with their loss.
My uncle is also struggling with having my mums illness to deal with too (his sister)

In December last year, mum was diagnosed with cancer, and was very very ill during the first 3 months - several times we thought we were going to lose her as she was bed bound and too ill even to have chemo, which we were told at the time she desperately needed to have any chance of survival.
This turned around about March time, and then, after 6 sessions of chemo, the tumour was gone.
However, at the end of November, following routine blood tests and a scan, we were informed that not only had it come back, but there was now nothing they could do, and she was given just weeks to live.

The last 3 weeks have been stressful to say the least, with having to adjust meds, visitors wanting to come see her, etc, and it's so hard trying to be upbeat given the season, knowing this is the last one for mum.
We've tried to make it special, to give us nice memories to remember, but are also very aware that the problem is being 'masked' with pain relief (and the steroids given purely to get her through Christmas.)
We have been warned that the decline will be rapid when it hits, so feel like we are sitting on a time bomb.

Trying to sort out the emotional and practical things at the same time is not a good balance

[cymruambyth]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

I'm so sorry to hear that you are having such a terrible time. All I can do is send hugs of support. Don't forget that you can always let off steam on AAD. We try to give support for everything, not just financial problems.

[Undercover Elsa]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

Ohh honey, I am so so sorry
I know from first hand experience how tremendously hard it is. Your Mum sounds like an incredibly courageous lady, and I'm sure she will be as worried about you and the rest of your family as you all are about her.
All you can do is show each other how much you love them, make each moment as precious as you can.
You think you can't cope and won't be able to get through it, but you can and you will, we're all much stronger than we think, even when our hearts are breaking.
Sending love and hugs
Elsa xxx

[alwaysskint]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

Thank you both for your support, it means an awful lot.
She's a stubborn old goat lol, she's also my best friend.

Christmas last year was bloody awful - she got admitted on boxing day but had took to her bed on the 20th, this whole year has just been one big rollercoaster of emotions, yes she got a year, but there's been no quality time to it
This whole year has just been so hard, trying to juggle eating, sleeping, working, hospital visiting, appointments, chemo sessions, doctors appts, physio appts (had to build her back her up after nearly 4 months in bed)
She had steroid induced psychosis for nearly 2 months - gee, that was fun!
So to get through all that...., and then to be given the terminal diagnosis just when we were starting to 'do' things and make plans.... well, it felt like being kicked in the stomach.

Knowing what's coming, well that's even harder, and not knowing 'when' is just torture.

We know that the steroids are helping to keep her on an even keel with her appetite and mobility as when she came off them she was a mess for 3 days, but she was determined to see Christmas, and so she did.

[nanna58]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

Heartfelt thoughts from me too really sad take care of yourself xxxxx

[Pixie]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

So sorry to hear what an awful year you've had alwaysskint

If you want to get things off your chest we have a thread for members dealing with serious illness, either in themselves or a loved one TLC - Mutual Support for Members dealing with Serious Illness It really does provide that emotional support that you may not get from family/loved ones, either because they're scared or they're not sure what to say.

[alwaysskint]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

Apologies Pixie for only just seeing this.

Just an update really, Mum passed away in January, surrounded by us all.
We'd been warned that it would be a rapid decline, and it was, the steroids had definitely lulled us all into a false sense of security.
She'd managed to get her meds mixed up, which in turn meant she got confused easily, which meant her meds got messed up, and so the cycle started....
She'd done amazingly well to get 7 weeks down the line from the terminal diagnosis, but we started to need outside help/support.
Being admitted to the local hospice meant mum had support during the times we weren't going to be able to be there, and also meant she could 'entertain' visitors with better facilities lol.
Sadly, things didn't go quite according to plan.
18 hours after being admitted Mum started to deteriorate, rapidly.
35 hours later, she died :-(

She's left a massive hole, but I'm incredibly proud of her.
She fought fights all her life, this one just proved to be one too many x

[IF]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

I'm so sorry alwaysskint

IF

[cymruambyth]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

I'm so sorry about your mum; no matter what your age you always miss her.

[alwaysskint]

Re: MS and depression - debt getting bigger

It's odd really, we knew it was terminal, but still, the speed, particularly once she arrived at the hospice, rocked us all.
Even the district nurses said they thought she had another week or more, and one was going to pop in on her way to visit her parents, who live nearby, the day mum passed.
She left us with enough tales, stories, and laughter, to sink a battleship lol, so she's unlikely to be forgotten any time soon x